


Reflections

by rafestark



Category: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Genre: Friendship, Gen, Past Child Abuse
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-30
Updated: 2015-05-30
Packaged: 2018-04-01 23:34:12
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,793
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4038877
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rafestark/pseuds/rafestark
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When Hank Summers turns up unannounced, Tara shows Buffy what she's learned about fighting invisible demons.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Reflections

_Disclaimer: I don't own Buffy the Vampire Slayer and I won't make money out of this_

_Warnings: Discussion and brief, non-explicit description of child molestation (although obviously still with the potential to be upsetting and disturbing)_

 

“What's on your mind, Dawnie?”

“I was wondering what we know exactly about how my fake memories work.” Dawn asked, her expression serious and wan.

“I don't know if 'fake' is the right word.” Tara began hesitantly, unsure where the younger woman was going with this.

“Whatever, I just mean...is there any way to find out whether the monks had to change a whole lot of things to fit me in, or if they just sort of added me on to things that already happened? Did they change Buffy's life to turn her into the sort of person that would do anything to save me, or did they just send me to someone who was already like that?” She demanded, becoming more distressed as she considered the possibilities.

“Okay hon, just take a breath for a second. Buffy knew, just like you do, that there's no way to change the past. Technically the only proof anybody has of their past are their memories and the different artifacts we collect on the way. I guess I'm saying, whether they were changed or not, you've got to work with what you have.” Tara explained, rubbing the girl's hand in comfort.

“That's sort of what I'm worried about.” Dawn bit her lip.

“What exactly is bothering you?” Tara asked, seeing that something was preying on her mind.

“I...remembered something. Or, I actually thought about a memory that I hadn't really thought about in a long time. Do you ever do that?” The youngest Summers asked, not entirely confident she was making sense.

“Sure.” Tara smiled. “Like, the other day I remembered asking my mom why my goldfish had changed colour. She told me goldfish could change colour like we change clothes just because they want to. I believed her at the time and never really gave much thought to it...and it was only a few days ago that I remembered and realised she must have replaced Goldie.” She shrugged, a little embarrassed.

“Yeah.” Dawn agreed, pleased Tara understood her as always. “Well, I remembered something I saw when I was a kid. It didn't make any sense to me so I guess I just forgot, but...I remembered today and I think....” she trailed off, trying to think how to explain. Tara squeezed her hand, not wanting to rush her. “I think it was something bad.”

“Can you tell me what you saw?” Tara asked gently.

“I don't know if I should.” Dawn bit her lip. “I mean, I don't even know if it actually happened or if the monks made it up. Or maybe it did happen but if the monks hadn't made me human no-one else would ever know.”

“Well maybe that's the point.” The witch suggested. “Maybe they chose to have you see it so that someone else would know. But without knowing what it is, that's about all I can think of.”

“I guess. I mean...well, Buffy's dead now, anyway.” She swallowed the sudden lump in her throat. “I think I was probably about three or four. Mum wasn't home, and Hank was watching us. I had already gone to bed, but I got up again because I wanted a drink. I went downstairs to find Hank or Buffy. They were both still up, watching TV. I got as far as the door but before I called out, something stopped me. I'm not really sure what it was, now. Maybe that Buffy was so quiet – she always talked over TV shows. Or maybe because I couldn't really work out what I was seeing. But...Buffy was on Hank's lap. He was...well, he was touching her. Under her pants. And she was...well, it looked like she was just squirming but...I guess she was struggling. And I remember what Hank said, because I was kind of jealous, you know? That maybe he liked her best. He was saying that...” Dawn's voice broke a bit and she coughed, trying to work through the lump in her throat. “she was a good girl and that she was making him happy.”

There was a heavy silence for a second while Tara tried to work out what to say, and Dawn struggled with her thoughts.

“And...” the girl continued, “and I've tried to think of any other way of understanding it, you know? Like maybe I remembered wrong. But I don't know why I would remember something wrong that I didn't even think of for so long.”

Tara reached over and pulled the younger woman into a hug. Dawn didn't even know why she was crying so hard. When it had all struck her earlier in the day, it made her more nauseous than sad. But Buffy had died to save her, and she couldn't help but feel she hadn't even remembered that her sister needed help until it was too late.

Tara did everything she could to hold herself together for Dawn's sake. She couldn't begin to think of what to say. Dawn was right. Now Buffy had died, there was very little they could do. She didn't want to upset the girl further by asking whether Hank had any children with his new wife. Deciding to leave any questions for another time, Tara settled on, “Buffy was happy, Dawn. She had friends and family that she loved and who loved her – still love her. I think that no matter what happened, and what the monks may have done – that's the main thing.”

 

In all the stress and confusion surrounding Buffy's resurrection, Tara didn't remember her conversation with Dawn until Giles broached the topic of Hank.

“Should we contact your father?” Giles asked. “We could explain there was some kind of mix up...”

Buffy had told a joke about the man even noticing she was dead, but had been firm about not telling him. Tara wasn't sure if she imagined the look in the Slayer's eyes, or if it had been caused by the general malaise coming back to life had left her in.

There had never been a good moment to discuss the subject. Their lives remained hectic in the usual way, and even on the occasions they had time for serious conversations, Tara never wanted to add to the tension of the day's topic by bringing up Hank Summers.

 

Eventually Hank Summers forced the issue himself.

“Buffy? Some dude is in the foyer of the castle. Says he's your dad.” The young slayer making this announcement only looked slightly interested in the news she was imparting, but it dropped into the planning meeting they had been having like a bomb.

“Oh, no need to announce me.” Hank appeared in the doorway behind the younger slayer, who just shrugged. “Hello there Buffy. Hello everyone.” He entered the room as if he belonged in it. “I'm sure you won't mind giving my daughter and I some time alone to catch up.”

The comment spurred everyone into action, automatically standing and moving out of politeness, although none of them could help glancing at Buffy for direction.

She just sat, looking stricken, and Tara realised as she followed the others toward the door that even though Buffy was more than capable of defending herself if needed, she couldn't leave the slayer to face Hank alone.

“So, nice place you have here,” she heard him beginning as if they had already left, but after the others were through the door, she shut it behind them and turned back to face into the room.

Hank looked a little surprised, no doubt having assumed any disagreement might come from the other older man who had been in the room, Giles.

“I believe I asked for some time alone with my daughter.” Hank said coldly.

Buffy was looking at her, head cocked and seeming more present and attentive than she had only moments earlier.

“I'm not going anywhere.” She spoke in short sentences, terrified she might stutter but determined to continue regardless. “Unless Buffy tells me to.”

Hank rolled his eyes at the dramatics and put a hand on Buffy's shoulder, and Tara knew she wasn't imagining the slayer shifting away from the touch although it could be for any number of reasons. “Tell her then, Buffy.”

“It's fine, Tara.” Buffy said quietly, but all Tara could think of was holding Dawn, distraught at remembering something that, but for the monks, might never have been known.

“No.” Tara answered. She could see that Buffy didn't want her to leave, but watching her eyes for signs of annoyance made sure to clarify that it was the slayer's choice, but it would need to be an instruction. “Not unless you tell me to leave.”

“Now you listen to me young lady...” Hank began, before Buffy cut him off.

“No. Tara lives here. You weren't even invited.” She stood up. “What do you want?”

“Do I need an invitation? I'm your father.”

It was probably meant to sound loving, but even based only on the evidence of Buffy's rare words about Hank, all Tara could see was the imposition.

“All the more reason not to force your company on her.” Tara spoke sharply without thinking, and both of them now looked startled and suspicious. “I – I meant why show up unannounced rather than asking.” She shrank back at having spoken out of turn.

Buffy was looking at Tara like she had never seen her before, knowing how uncharacteristic it was for her to argue with anyone.

“And just who the hell are you to ask?” Hank finally lost his temper. “Her girlfriend?” he sneered, and Tara ignored him, locking eyes with Buffy.

“I'm family.” Tara answered, and Buffy's eyes started filling with unshed tears even as as a small but genuine smile broke through.

 

 

"So that was kind of bad-ass." Buffy sat down next to Tara hours later. "Telling him to get out like that." There was still an awful lot that hadn't been said, asked or explained. But they were both alive, and there was time.

"Well," Tara blushed slightly, "only because I knew you didn't want him here." 

Buffy leaned over and hugged her. "Thank you." She whispered, knowing Tara could hear. "For being there for me - and for Dawn, when I wasn't." 

"You've taught me a lot about fighting demons," Tara sat back when Buffy seemed ready to end the hug, "but mostly I think you've shown me that real family doesn't let you fight them alone."

Dawn saw them, and ran over, and it turned into a group hug. 


End file.
